Often heard people consoling :
“Everything is fine” even when it’s not.
“Don’t overthink, just be happy” as if it’s just that easy.
“Don’t be sad” like that will help.
“Just stop thinking about it” like that will heal it.
“Always be happy” when it’s literally impossible to be always happy. We get sad sometimes & it’s completely natural.
“Don’t think about suicide, you’re a happy person.” like those thoughts are in our control.
“You shouldn’t be depressed, you have everything” like depression is a choice.
“Just chill” doesn’t work every time. When something bad happens that makes you sad or when you lose something/someone, not thinking about it or simply distracting from it is not the solution. Most people do this because they find the escape much easier than to feel those negative emotions.
But it is not a good practice. We may feel better in the moment but in the long run, it suppresses our emotions, develops anxiety and detaches us from our emotions and feelings. Isn’t it okay to be sad? I guess it is okay to feel any kind of negative emotions. Having the power to confront your own self is not a small thing.
You might feel your way is easier, that escaping and hiding your pain with a smile is better. Maybe you’ll even say that there are no side effects from it. But it’s not so. You don’t see them because you choose not to. But they are all inside you. It might be low self-esteem, inability to sustain healthy relationships, endless feeling of loneliness, or unreasonable anger. But it’s all there. Better vent out and let your emotions flow because no one can be positive at all times.
The pandemic begins suddenly, violently, recklessly. No one knows what to do. The world goes silent. Not everyone one knows how to deal with isolation. Grief knocks at doors and loneliness welcomes us home. Life comes to standstill and breathing feels heavy.
They say its the beginning of the end. They never taught us how to deal with endings. How do you mourn the dead you never met. What to do with all these funerals you could never attend .
Helplessness looms on heads and shops run out of masks.
There’s no justice for displaced. How do you stay at home when there’s no home? Too many questions lie unanswered.
Suffering doesn’t seem to end. The funny part is no one knew how badly they want to exist until a virus strain strikes.
Everyone’s tired of wondering if a vaccine or practicing religion can save them. Will an antibacterial soap wash the blood of everyone they killed on their hands ? Will they someday understand how to stop mourning each morning?
The word positive seems deadlier than ever before. For once in life, everyone wants to be positive that theyare negative. Tough times. Hopeless cases of desperation.
How do you pray when you don’t know what to pray for?
How do you believe when your beliefs could kill you!
It’s so easy, especially right now, to be afraid — afraid of what tomorrow might bring, of what could go wrong, of all the things that may potentially fall apart. It’s so easy to hold onto the negative, to clutch it within your palm, unwilling to loosen your grip.⠀
But please, don’t forget the light within you. Don’t forget the potential you have to reshape, to grow, to remold, and to change the world around you. It all starts with your perspective and a willingness to try. It all starts by saying, “Okay, I don’t have control over what’s happening, but I’m still going to love. I’m still going to show up. I’m still going to move forward.”⠀
Life will undoubtedly give us road blocks and dead-ends, wrong turns and ‘go back four steps’ buttons. But your biggest weapons are your mind and heart. You have the power of what you focus on, the power of what you choose, and the power to begin again. ⠀
There is light within you.⠀
And it’s brighter than you think.⠀
Hear your voice clearly in your head. Start treating yourself the way you want others to treat you. Make the voice in your head your best friend and your biggest supporter. It is this voice which will either make you or break you, which will either shape you or destroy you. Everything else is inconsequential.
Change your internal dialogue and you will for sure see a change in yourself. Being positive may seem a bit theoretical at times but overcoming negative thoughts is something which is most important. Listen to your inner voice because it will never guide you on the wrong path.
Frankly speaking, there are no rules in life. You can trust what you want to and easily change those beliefs when you wish. You are not defined by your past and you can change it when you want! It is most important to follow what makes you happy. Even in relationships, there is no need to feel miserable. You cannot be with someone for life and it needs a strong conviction. It is tough to believe that you will probably never hear from this person again and unfulfilled love is indeed soul-crushing. But not everything is meant to go your way. Many people are not destined to be together and you simply cannot deny that fact.
These days I’ve been so much more at peace with myself, I am happy where I’m at and I believe it’s better to let things move forward in their own direction. You can’t simply force things on others. A lot of people, I had issues with, are no longer there in my life. Many new people have come in and are strong pillars of support. I am allowing both, the opportunities and the people who are meant for me to come my way and to let go all that what isn’t. I’ve learned to recognize when I’m being negative towards myself and how to raise myself up instead and turn things around.
How many times have you had a negative thought about something that may or may not happen? It is important that you understand that these thoughts often arise out of your fear of the unknown and so you must question these thoughts before you believe them. Generally the cases of them coming true will be very low. A thought is harmless unless you believe in it. It is not the thought but the attachment to it that often leads to our suffering. When we get attached to a thought, we start believing it is true even before verifying its authenticity. Negative thoughts often arise due to the fear of the unknown and carry no evidence of being real because they have not even occurred as yet. They are a natural response from your brain to alert you from all the upcoming challenges. The only purpose of these thoughts is to act as a reminder and prepare you to be aware.
We come from a survival and scarcity based culture that we simply cannot conceive the bigger possibilities of life that lie ahead of us. Nurturing a mindset of abundance is absolutely essential for your general well being and growth. So be happy and live life king-size. Hope for the best and get ready to face the worst!
Sometimes letting go is necessary. It may not be easy but letting it go on can be much more painful. Destiny cannot be changed and you cannot really bluff what is written in your fate. But in the end, what you need to remember is that there is a difference between being loved and being valued. Many may love you but it is important to know who values you.
This process is quite heavy and needs a lot of willingness. Goodbyes are always hard but at times it is necessary. When you let go, you let go of your past, meaning some part of you, you let go your expectations, your existence, in other words. And trust me, it is a horrific process.
I once read somewhere ” The only meaning that anything has is the meaning you give it, ” and trust me it makes a lot of sense. Fear is the house for all negative emotions. If you were not afraid of letting go, you would have done it already. I know it is not that simple as it appears to be but you are the sailor of your life’s ship and you need to decide what is the best for you.