Staying in a relationship just because you love someone is not worth it. Love is not just the only thing that matters. Respect and reassurance are also equally important. Happiness is what you need. Knowing that you are their favorite person everyday is what you need. Learn to love yourself instead.
Frankly speaking, there are no rules in life. You can trust what you want to and easily change those beliefs when you wish. You are not defined by your past and you can change it when you want! It is most important to follow what makes you happy. Even in relationships, there is no need to feel miserable. You cannot be with someone for life and it needs a strong conviction. It is tough to believe that you will probably never hear from this person again and unfulfilled love is indeed soul-crushing. But not everything is meant to go your way. Many people are not destined to be together and you simply cannot deny that fact.
These days I’ve been so much more at peace with myself, I am happy where I’m at and I believe it’s better to let things move forward in their own direction. You can’t simply force things on others. A lot of people, I had issues with, are no longer there in my life. Many new people have come in and are strong pillars of support. I am allowing both, the opportunities and the people who are meant for me to come my way and to let go all that what isn’t. I’ve learned to recognize when I’m being negative towards myself and how to raise myself up instead and turn things around.
Sometimes you are not tired, you are simply done. Done with people! At times I feel as if the events around me have a life of their own, and no matter how hard I try to mould them into a better form it is all going to be a waste of time – so it is worthless to even try. Life is too short to deal with battles that are pointless. So it is way better to leave some things on God and go with the flow!
It is true that when loves goes wrong, nothing goes right. Super strong emotion such as jealousy is ultimately temporary. All you need to do is watch it come and leave. You do not need to react to it. As far as quitting is concerned, rest assured not to worry about being labeled a quitter, as there is a hell lot of difference between giving up and resigning yourself so that you can finally accept things as they are.
When you feel everything is going wrong, remember that it is temporary. The phase will eventually pass and it is not the bad times that define you rather it’s your approach that does. Write about it and vent out your frustrations. Acknowledge the fact that life has different plans at times so do not be at the end of your tether. Overthinking will certainly destroy your mood so it is better to let go.
Some things are hard to let go. Somethings have a habit of coming back and one of which is true love. Giving up on your loved one would mean giving up on a part of ourselves.
I have always felt that when it comes to love, you could always make some changes, fill in the cracks, build a new foundation may be to cover up the old, but you cannot simply ignore the fact that the scarring will always be there no matter what. And trust me, true love comes back. May be after quite a long time but it does.
Think of it this way! Remember the best slice of the juiciest and yummiest pizza that you have ever eaten? Were you not disappointed every time you had a bite of an entirely different pizza which doesn’t even match to it? Same is the case with love. Life is full of letdowns. When you start seeing someone new, you would obviously compare him with the “best you ever had.” Understanding how much you love someone may take time. You can spend hours, months and even years together without completely appreciating what that person means to you. And you only get to know the worth of that person when he is gone. When you lose someone whom you once loved, you may realise that life without him simply doesn’t work the way it’s supposed to.
When there is a love so deep that you can’t let it go, the world conspires and brings it back to you. If this person affects your day-to-day decision-making, then with each decision you find yourself one step closer to your true love. In the case of love, you need to have a little bit of faith, and trust me, miracles do happen.
Love is not synonymous with pain and the day you realise this will be the day you accept the person who treats you right! It will be the day you let real love in, one which brings butterflies in your stomach and gives you a heart pump the moment you catch a glimpse of them. It is a love which comes in smiles and laughs and causes an ache in your stomach when you both are together. It is a love which makes you the best version of you, which believes in you when you stop believing in yourself. A love that smiles at you even when life is tough and tells you that “it will all be fine because I have faith in you.”
Love is beautiful when felt for the right person. There is a place in my heart where a part of you will always be a part of me. This is love and when you realise love is not painful, that day you will welcome it in its entirety.
Here are a few noteworthy dialogues from the Bollywood movie Kalank. The movie was not a great one though, but the dialogues are worth sharing which would for sure stay with you.
“When someone’s destruction seems like our victory then there is no one in the world who is as devastated as us.”
“The colour of love and hatred both are red but the difference is that in hatred the world gets destroyed and in love you have to destroy yourself. Still love is the one that gets defamed.”
“Some relationships are like debts. You don’t have to fulfill them, instead you have to repay them.”
“You’ll find thousands of reasons in the market of fear for not falling in love, but you have to search for only one reason in your own heart to fall in love.”
“Hope only makes you wait. It doesn’t change the reality.”
Quite funny indeed. We know not what destiny wants from us. When we meet someone it is tough to figure out whether it is destiny, coincidence or pure luck. Same is the case when we lose someone, no matter be it a broken relationship or the loss of a person due to unexpected death, the hardest part to deal with and experience is the vacuum of loss that is felt in the heart.
It feels as if all of a sudden a very important and significant part of our life, which is the most essential for us is taken away. There can be no immediate replacement. What is left behind is a big void. An empty space, a black hole which we simply cannot have any idea of. We start feeling hollow, it is a feeling like suddenly our hearts have been taken away from us. And trust me, this feeling is deadly.
What destiny wants is a question no one has an answer to, but I wish there was an answer to this. Some times you love a person with all your heart and do all the possible things you can to keep him in your life but destiny has other plans for you. You have to leave them because they are not destined to be in your life. And leaving is not easy, especially when you love someone. It’s not tough to leave people behind, it ‘s their memories that haunt.
It’s true when said – ” Tumse milna ittefaq tha, bichadna naseeb.” In English – “Meeting you was a mere coincidence, parting ways was destiny.” But I guess you keep learning when life unfolds itself and evolve during the process.
What destiny wants cannot be known before hand. This reminds me of a famous English couplet that says, “It’s fate that flings the dice and when it flings/ Of kings makes peasants and of peasants makes kings.” True indeed!
There was a plant I really wanted to buy from the market. It was a small and delicate one and had a unique charm. I had made up my mind to buy that house plant, a one which was quite low maintenance if you ask me. It did not need watering every day and it was quite an achievement to nurture it. But gradually, I lost interest in it. It did not receive much attention from my side and one day noticed a withered pot. The plant though had grown taller but had shrivelled up and was beyond repair. Yet, I kept on watering it in the hope that it would revive again but it did not.
This is just like a metaphor for relationships. Similar to the plant, you feel you like someone and bring them into your life. You make a special space for them, do what is required for them, enjoy the time spent, become too comfortable and gradually you tend to stop valuing the things you once fought for.
When you water the dead plants, it is simply the denial phase where you hesitate to accept the absence of something and do not pay any heed to your own faults. Just as watering dead plants is a waste in a similar way watering dead relationships is also futile. Needless to say, it is hard to let go of something that has been close to you for quite a long time but it is important to acknowledge the fact that there is a difference between loving someone and having loved someone once. Sooner or later you have to realise your own feelings and take charge for it. If you feel you are watering a dead plant and the spark is dwindling, it will only add to your own irritation and annoyance. This is the time when you should finally consider moving on.
Generally it is not about the romantic way you meet someone. It’s basically about your compatibility, gestures and adoration. When it comes down to one thing to sustain love, it’s definitely choice. When you choose to love someone, it’s your decision. Every second, you put some effort to nurture that love and this gets us in trouble. I feel its wrong to say that love is something which happens to us. It’s something we make happen.
Love is an action, a pure choice, a commitment. The most beautiful thing about love is that you know that you are chosen by the person you chose. Love needs sacrifice and it won’t always be easy. But it is most beautiful when reciprocated. When you love someone you have something which is so profound. You have a home in that person, where you can be your own self, somewhere you can rest without being judged.
You will have some one who sees you truly and loves you forever. You don’t choose the one you will be attracted to, but you choose the one with whom you will stay in love with. Feelings are fleeting, it is a fickle thing. How you are feeling today will not resonate with the way you feel tomorrow. But real love is constant, it’s tangible. And when life becomes too unbearable, it’s love that gives us the strength. Feelings do not play any role here. When life throws us a curve ball, it’s in love where you will get the much-needed stability. You can’t just abandon love specially when its hard.
Love isn’t really a feeling, nor is it a state of euphoria. It’s hard work which needs constant compromise. Feelings can flicker, it can come and go. But real love? It stays and goes on forever!
“Ishq kiya dil o jaan se bhi zada tumhe,
Nahi andaaza tha tum sirf dard ban k reh jaoge.
Krte na ye khata fir hum,
agar pta hota k tum is pyar ko kabhi smjh hi na paoge. ”
This is a maxim I always stand by in every point of my life. I have been believing in this right from the very beginning since I was quite young. Name it my strong belief in God or whatever; I being an ardent supporter of this quote, never felt disappointed only coz of this one statement that has shaped and molded my entire life.
Whatever a man thinks or plans to do or achieve or aims to carry out; there is some supernatural power (God) above all who has the reins of the man’s life in his hands. Many a time it may be contradictory to the wishes of the man and goes in sync with the plans of God. All the abilities of a man are subject to certain limitations and that is where God’s actions come into picture.
No matter what you plan or how you may try to execute the plan; it goes unsaid that the end result will certainly not be in your hands.